"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." 2 Cor. 12:9-10
I had a small epiphany during services today. It's funny because it's all stuff I already knew... I've been a Christian practically all of my life... things just hit me in the head today- and it happened to be while I was listening (for once). Usually, when things knock me in the head... I just wonder where the bruise came from... today I was fully present and I know that I heard from God. Here is what he said to me:
"Stop being a big fat whiny baby. Stop coming up with excuses as to why you aren't fit for where I've placed you. I have you here for a reason... accept it. Work it. Use it for My good. Stop complaining- your weaknesses only show My strength and your self-perceived inadequacies don't matter. You are where you are for this season- don't bury the talents you were given in the ground. Honor me and I will honor you."
I've had serious adjustment issues with becoming a pastor's wife. We made the switch into ministry in October of '05, so I'm going on a little over three years now... internally rebelling all the way. I really liked being a cop's wife. There was a certain amount of security there... certainly more money... and a lot less expected of me.
I didn't feel like I was living in... well... a fish bowl (HEY- what a great name for a blog!). I have felt so much pressure, constant scrutiny. I have never felt so... imperfect and weak. Both physically, mentally, and emotionally. But yeah, that verse got to me today... and during Communion... I heard from God.
I know that what has been asked of me is nothing compared to the sacrifice that Christ made... and He certainly wasn't a big fat whiny baby.
So I'm going to do my best. I'm stepping up to the plate, Lord. And I'm going to swing for the fence. Your grace is sufficient for me.
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3 comments:
Wow, awesome post. It is amazing how God works. I am looking at making my own transition here in the near future from seminary wife to pastor's wife. Keep writing, I need all the encouragement I can get! How are you feeling?
your blog title caught my eye as mine is 'life in a fishbowl'
great word -- Keep swinging for the fence - the possibilities are endless because we serve a great big God.
Thanks for this post! I have been a minister's wife for 15 years and relate to many of the thoughts you shared. I smiled when I read that you enjoyed being a cop's wife because there was a certain amount of security. Maybe only another pastor's wife can see that it can feel less secure at times for your husband to be a pastor than a police officer! My husband is not in any physical danger at his job. But he is still hit by 'friendly fire' all the time. That is a stress not everyone understands. Nice to hear your thoughts on the matter. Keep in the race!
Jill S
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