and a miracle. I'm restless, I know I'm not in the right job. I shouldn't be doing the books at the church; I hate knowing everything I do...who gives, who doesn't... how close we are to making or not making payroll... etc. I feel like if I could step back from the day-to-day runnings of the church I would be a more effective pw. I would care more, be able to be more emotionally available for my husband and the people in our congregation... I would be able to say no every once in a while. I am tired of always having to be "on."
As it stands, I'm constantly stressed. This is where God has me now... but I'm praying for a way out where we can still survive financially. Working somewhere else- somewhere I'd like that would allow me to do my job and go home... preferably with hours compatible to my son's school schedule for driving him back and forth.
I know that's asking a lot and that I'm plain lucky to HAVE a job right now. And I CAN be content where I'm at- I just need to figure out a way to separate the stress of working with my husband 40-plus hours a week, ministering with him on Sundays (and on call 24/7), and knowing all the financial (and other) details of the church...
God help me through this time- show me your will- and if it's to stay where i'm at, please help me accept it. I know you have the best in mind for me...Please help me to believe and live that truth.
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